"I Was Literally Looking Depression in the Face": How the Holy Spirit Set This Film Star Free From Depression

Emily Jones : Aug 31, 2018
CBN News

"I could have let it take me out but it was just like, 'God, I've done everything as right as I could. I'm even helping other people live out their dreams when I don't even have my dream yet. But I'm never going to be stingy, I'm always going to be a giver." – Yvonne Orji

(Los Angeles, CA) — [CBN News] Yvonne Orji, star on HBO's hit series "Insecure," recently opened up about her battle with depression and how a specific word from the Holy Spirit changed everything. (Photo Credit: CBN News)

On episode 4 of her weekly podcast Jesus & Jollof with Luvvie Ajayi, she talks about her discouraging journey in the entertainment industry. Before her big break with HBO, she faced closed door after closed door. The constant rejection wore her down.

"I was literally looking depression in the face. I could have let it take me out but it was just like, 'God, I've done everything as right as I could,'" she said. "I'm even helping other people live out their dreams when I don't even have my dream yet. But I'm never going to be stingy, I'm always going to be a giver."

For a time, Orji didn't even have gas money to go to church. She turned to God.

"I said, 'God, if You want me to volunteer at the church I need gas money.' And there was, sometimes, where I only had enough money to get to church or to get to the Bible study," Orji explained. "I was like, 'God, somebody is going to have to bless me with money to get back.'"

God was faithful to provide.

"Each time somebody on Facebook would be like, 'Hey, God, put it on my heart to give you $200 in your PayPal,'" she said.

Later, a word from the Holy Spirit radically changed her outlook on life. After being discouraged from seeing so many young people living out their dreams at the NBC Universal Short Film Festival in 2014, she heard the Spirit say, "what's in your hand?"

The next day while reading the Bible she stumbled upon Psalm 31:14-15 which says, "I trust in You, O Lord ... my times are in Your hand."

The scripture pierced her heart and she suddenly gained new motivation to work on her First Gen web series. It wasn't long until she got a call from HBO offering her a role on the show "Insecure."

Orji has been in the entertainment industry for some time now but she refuses to compromise on her faith.

Last year the actress told People Magazine that she will remain sexually pure until she is married.

"Before any of the fame happened, I sat down with myself and with God and thought, when I make it, how do you want me to represent You while I'm here?" The actress told People Magazine. "It was like, OK, I know why I'm here. It's to make You proud."

She says she enjoys being a role model for many people.

"So much is happening in our community, in our nation, and now we get a chance to look on television and see a version of ourselves that we can actually relate to. I think that's what speaks to the heart of a lot of people. It's super cool to be in the middle of that," she says.

CBN News